IF WE HAVE TO SHOP, LET'S HAVE SOME FUN

Before the boy was born, Mummy and I called him Triscuit, because we were after some of those sweet Nabisco dollars and we weren't above "branding." His middle name was Fanta, because we didn't expect Coca-Cola or Pepsi would settle for a middle name, so we had to go with a less prestigious brand.

But perhaps we were going about it all wrong. Why not just roll the boy around Costco and let them pay us for the privilege?

We even have a catchphrase. See the photo second from the bottom. "Greatness awaits." We might be onto something here.